Pregnancy: Week 25

Saturday, April 8, 2017
I must have really needed some time off because I couldn’t motivate myself to do anything today.  I spent almost the entire day lying on the couch.  I felt bad because I had things I wanted to accomplish, but I couldn’t even force myself to do the simplest of tasks.

When it was time to go to bed, Kyle put his hand on my lower belly to feel the baby moving.   Not only did he feel it move, but we realized that the baby would move more to the sound of his voice!  It was really sweet and a really nice father moment for him.  I know fathers have a difficult time connecting to the baby before it’s born, so it was really nice to see.  To be honest, I’m having a difficult time connecting with the baby before it’s born and I can even feel it moving around inside of me!

Sunday, April 9, 2017
Because I spent yesterday doing next to nothing, I spent today trying to make up for it.  Unfortunately, I had managed to compile my to-do lists so that it would take close to a full day to complete the tasks on each.  As such, I completed Saturday’s tasks, but not today’s.

Monday, April 10, 2017
I felt like my weekend didn’t exist.  I did a lot of stuff, but I was just looking forward to the end of the week when my spring break started.  I wasn’t looking forward to the long trip Kyle and I were going to take to visit his mom, but it would have been nice to just have a break.  I like his mom well enough, but they don’t actually eat any meals other than dinner, so I end up spending more money than I’d like just to eat breakfast and lunch.

Work was tough because I spent most of the time trying not to fall asleep in my classes as the kids watched documentaries.

When we got home, Kyle and I were watching a movie trailer on his ipad when I felt the baby moving.  It had a classic rock song playing, so we decided to play a number of different songs to see how the baby would react.  It turned out that the baby liked my music better than his, but would always move around when the music had a good beat!  It was a lot of fun!  It also helped me to develop a connection with the baby other than getting annoyed with it for kicking me in the bladder!

Tuesday, April 11, 2017
I got a lot done today in preparation for my upcoming spring break.  The idea was to complete as much of my to-do list as possible so I didn’t have anything to worry about while I was on break.  I just had students watch documentaries while I worked on my computer.  I feel like I’ve been a bad art teacher lately considering that is all I have been having my classes to lately.  There are even some simple things I could have them do that doesn’t require much energy on my part, so they’re still making art, but I really haven’t been feeling up to it.

I was tired when I got home, but I still managed to push myself to make sure laundry got done.  When I was finished, however, I just went right to bed, exhausted.

Wednesday, April 12, 2017
Today was a rough day.  Several of the co-workers I’m closest to (I wouldn’t quite call them friends) were having a rough time.  One of them had to leave early for a wedding she was in, but our boss was giving her a hard time about it.  Another one had her husband coming home from a nursing home, so she needs to take care of him again and he pretty much gives her a hard time about everything.  Another one has been dealing with a sick mother and a broken finger.  Needless to say, most people I encountered were in a bad mood.

The students didn’t help matters.  They were antsy and didn’t want to listen.  When I got home, I was too exhausted to pack for our upcoming trip.  Instead, I just laid on the couch until bedtime.  Kyle was remarkably good about not nagging me to do the stuff I just didn’t have the energy to do.

Thursday, April 13, 2017
I was very much looking forward to getting work done with.  I only had three classes due to the half day.  I was very happy when they were over!  I had to stay late at work to finish up a few items on my to-do list that I didn’t want to carry over into my spring break and drove home.

When I got there, I was exhausted.  Kyle encouraged me to take a nap.  The nape didn’t help.  I was even more tired when I woke up.  After an hour, I dragged myself up and packed everything that I needed.  We left a little later than I would have liked and didn’t get to my middle sister’s house until close to 11.  When we got there, I was ready for sleep, so she just got us some blankets and let us get to sleep.

Friday, April 14, 2017
Kyle and I had slept very poorly the night before.  While my sister’s couch was comfortable enough, it was difficult to roll over to switch positions whenever one side hurt.  I woke up at one point to see Kyle lying on the floor next to me.  He later explained that while the recliner was comfortable, he was too far away from me, which I thought was rather sweet.

We spent the morning playing mini-golf with my sister. Thankfully, she won both rounds.  She’s such a sore loser, that it almost makes it worth it to let her win.  I never do, because I’m so competitive, but still, she would have been a pain in the ass if she hadn’t.  We went for massages next because both me and Kyle were really sore.  Kyle had never had a professional massage before.  He greatly enjoyed it.  We went back to my sister’s house, played with her dog, played a board game, and ate lunch.  Then she had to go to work and we had to drive to Kyle’s mother’s house.

Our trip was boring and uneventful, but I was still very worn out by the time we got there.  I hugged his mom and did my best to make small talk with her and Kyle’s step-dad.  I went to bed early and Kyle stayed up drinking with them.  I know he had been wanting to drink for awhile, but had nobody to drink with since I couldn’t drink.  I always had a bad feeling about him drinking.  A lot of his family are alcoholics, so maybe that’s all it is.  Nothing bad had happened other than him coming in and waking me up at about 3am and talking for hours about what he had discussed with his mom and step-dad.

Pregnancy: Week 24

Saturday, April 1, 2017
I guess my nesting instinct was alive and well. I continued to finish straightening up and arrange the nook of our bedroom where are keeping the baby stuff. Kyle wasn’t feeling well, so he called in to work. We mostly just hung out in the evening, compiled a food shopping list, and watched movies as I napped intermittently

Sunday, April 2, 2017
I woke up with a sore throat and a stuffy nose. I applied for a few jobs, but really didn’t feel up to doing any kind of fancy applications, even though there were a few of them.

The hospital I will be delivering at finally had an opening to do a tour. We saw the labor room and I got to ask some questions that I had. Many of my coworkers had delivered there and said so many good things about it that I had really expected something exceptional. To be honest, it looked like a hospital. There was nothing terribly exceptional about it, but at least we got it done! We now know our way around there and how to get there, which was important.

We ran a few errands afterwards, but I started to not feel well and got tired so we went home before completing the grocery shopping. I tried to go to bed early, but only succeeded in going to bed earlier than on previous nights.

Monday, April 3, 2017
I spent most of the day driving. I drove to my job interview and then drove back. The interview seemed to go quite well. I thought that it was a good sign that they asked about any other interviews I had. Even so, I thought it was a bit odd that they asked where else I had applied. Another thing that was odd was that when one of the interviewers came to get me, she took one look at me, said, “You’re pregnant! Did you tell us that on the phone?” I had not, and as far as I know, the interviewer asking any questions about pregnancy during an interview is illegal.

As I drove back, my cold started feeling worse and I got more progressively tired. I had planned to do some food shopping when I got home, but all that happened was I went home and went to sleep.

Tuesday, April 4, 2017
I slept horribly last night. I kept waking up needing to blow my nose. I apparently hit the snooze on my alarm clock for over two hours this morning. When I finally woke up enough to even be cognizant enough to realize what was going on, I noticed that it was already light outside. I had about 15 minutes to leave or I would be late for work.

I felt horrible, but I had to go in to work today. I needed to save my sick days for interviews. I had my students watching art videos again. I felt like I should teach them, but felt so crappy, that’s all I really could do. I could have fallen asleep at any point in time today.

Wednesday, April 5, 2017
I woke up late today. It was about 30 minutes after I usually would have left for work. I arrived with only a few minutes to spare. I was so tired and out of it, I really didn’t get a whole lot of work done.

My cold was starting to feel better, but I was so tired I almost fell asleep I a few of my classes while they were watching art documentaries. I think I am finally getting used to my size though.

It’s interesting. I spent my first trimester with no energy, waiting for the nausea to end and waiting for the day when I had a significantly reduced chance of miscarriage. My second trimester was full of announcements. I spent my time waiting for the first feeling of movement. Once that happened, I waited for the third trimester. That way, even if the baby were born early, it would still have a good chance of living. I wonder what my third trimester will bring. Will I just spend it watching myself grow bigger, waiting for the day the baby is ready to arrive?

Thursday, April 6, 2017
I woke up at 2:30am to use the bathroom, but I never got back to sleep. Work was thankfully easy due to an assembly for two of my classes and two others were on a field trip. I still had a difficult time focusing. I’m not typically one to have my sleep schedule disrupted.   I’ve always been a good sleeper and have been making sleep a priority in my life. This week has been particularly tough. I hope it won’t last.

The acid in my throat returned today. It was uncomfortable and I couldn’t get it to go away. Tums stopped working a few weeks ago. I suppose it was my own fault for eating a breakfast of bagels and orange juice. I will really need to amend my diet to accommodate for this new development. It really seems like that as soon as I learn to deal with another uncomfortable aspect of pregnancy, another one comes to take its place.

Friday, April 7, 2017
I woke up about 15 minutes after I usually leave for work again. I don’t understand why I keep sleeping so late. I have been going to bed on time too. I wanted nothing more than for the work day to be over. Of course, in the irony that is life, it was rather long and the students were poorly behaved and wouldn’t focus.

When I got home, I don’t even remember what I spent my time doing. I fell asleep quite early watching a movie. Kyle woke me up around 11 to make me take my pre-natal vitamins and go to bed. I was just so happy to be able to sleep!

Pregnancy: Week 23

Friday, March 31, 2017
Today was a tough day at work. I’m not sure what was going on with the students, but they were really difficult to control today. And that was true with all of my classes. I was really just looking forward to going home and enjoying a weekend off.

I took a bit of a nap earlier in the evening and could not get to sleep. I decided to stay up and do some straightening up of our apartment. I guess the nesting instinct is intact. Either that, or I just got fed up with how everything looks!

I have tried to eat a number of mini meals throughout the day and that seemed to help the acid in my throat a bit. I hope this doesn’t last throughout the whole rest of my pregnancy!

Thursday, March 30, 2017
I can’t believe how much energy I have had all week! I have gotten a ton of things done and I have felt really great! I am very pleased with the way things have been going and hope that it continues. I know that as the third trimester approaches, I will start feeling tired again, but I hope I just get caught up with everything I want done before then! The acid in my esophagus was still a problem today. I actively tried to eat and drink things that wouldn’t bother it, but it really didn’t help.

Wednesday, March 29, 2017
I can’t believe that with the small amount of sleep I got last night, I was still strangely awake and energized throughout the day. I even managed to cook dinner when I got home! Everything I ate bothered the acid, but I had to eat!

Tuesday, March 28, 2017
We had state testing today and I was asked to help proctor. It gave me a chance to get a lot of things done! The acid in my stomach was traveling up my esophagus all day and Tums were of no help.

Monday, March 27, 2017
It felt good to be able to go home after work and not stay after like I had last week. It did manage to help me prove to myself that I’m sometimes capable of more than I think!

Sunday, March 26, 2017
I was looking forward to sleeping in. I awoke a little after 7am, but I felt well-rested. By the time Kyle woke up around 11, I had done my taxes, applied to jobs, and paid my bills. That was good, because I didn’t feel like doing anything after that!

Saturday, March 25, 2017
I went to a hiking thingy again today. Kyle was looking forward to getting out in the woods, especially since I haven’t been capable of hiking recently. Unfortunately, when he got there, there was a problem with the sole of his hiking boot and he had to stay behind with me. There were a number of women who didn’t like hiking. They had set up sunshades and had a makeshift barbecue while the hikers (mostly men) were gone. Kyle was starting to get angrier and angrier about his boot because he really had wanted to hike and kept to himself.

I said hello to the numerous people I knew there. I considered them downgraded to “hugging acquaintances”. Basically, they’re people I say hi to, give a big hug, then walk away and never talk again. I find that now I’m pregnant, most conversations are about my condition and about the baby. I joked that I’m nothing but an incubator to people, but it didn’t bother me. I’m socially awkward at times, so it was helpful to always have something to talk about!

It turned out that there were a few people who really did think of themselves as my friends and hung out with me for over a half hour! I was surprised, but pleased! Two of them asked about touching the belly. I didn’t get it, but I let them. It’s not like the baby was anywhere near where they were touching anyway. My uterus just isn’t that big yet. I don’t understand why people want to touch a pregnant belly, but I didn’t mind so long as they asked first. I’ve heard horror stories about friends who have had strangers come up to them and just put their hand on their pregnant belly. Wtf!? Probably the best way I’ve heard of dealing with such a thing is to just put your hand on theirs. It allows them to realize that it’s invading your personal space. However, if some stranger did that to me, I wouldn’t put it past my reflexes to just grab their wrist and twist it away before they even touched me. I don’t understand why strangers think it’s okay to just touch you, for any reason.

Also, apparently my ex-husband now knows that I’m pregnant.  He congratulated Kyle (I still refuse to speak to him), but looked shocked when Kyle thanked him for his congratulations.  I said goodbye to friends and my ex was right there.  He tried talked to me and I completely ignored what he said.  I know it makes me look like the petty one to not acknowledge or speak to him, but it’s better than the alternative.  He can say all sorts of seemingly innocuous things to me that will hurt me thanks to our years together and the shit he managed to program in me.  I don’t know what else to do other than to look like the petty one.