I somehow managed to wake up 5 minutes before my alarm was supposed to go off because my alarm never went off. All I could think of was how it would feel being wrapped in Carl’s arms in the water. I couldn’t focus on anything I had to do this morning. I got very little done. I really wanted a cigarette, but when I tried smoking one, I didn’t want it after all. I barely made it to work on time, but it didn’t really matter.
I spent most of my day with no classes due to finals or weird schedules that nobody had informed me of. I spent a while chatting with my friend Aaron about my weird feeling and intuition about Carl. Carl, on the other hand, wasn’t all that talkative. I figured he was just busy at work, but he didn’t even chat much in the evening. Again, I started wondering if I was being an idiot for liking him. I started wondering if he wasn’t interested in only me. Or something. I hate how my perceptions change with my emotions. But then again, at the beginning of every relationship, there is always a level of uncertainty. If the beginning of a relationship is even what this is.
I started thinking about it and have decided to let him be the one who initiates the conversations tomorrow. It will work out well because it will likely be a busy day for me anyway.