January 18, 2016

I awoke early to drive to the retreat center. I awoke feeling worse. As I drove, I debated whether or not I should turn the car around. I decided not to. I had already said I’d be there and this retreat center always made me feel emotionally and spiritually better.

When I got there, I kept falling asleep during the meditation and part of the class too. I looked around and saw Chandra on the other side of the room. She left before I could talk to her because she spent most of the day helping out in the kitchen. I saw some other people I knew there and chatted with them instead. I really didn’t get any wisdom out of the lessons because I was unable to focus. I did end up feeling emotionally and spiritually better when I left, for which I was grateful.

When I got home, I couldn’t focus on anything. I tried to update my blog, but couldn’t even focus on reading it, much less writing it. I decided to work on my website for helping others do what I did over the course of the last year. I had already written down what I wanted to do, so it was just a matter of copying an pasting. I got quite a bit farther, but it’s still not done yet. I have a feeling it will take a long time to complete. There are the goals for each month to create. Then there are the resources I wanted to create to help people adhere to their goals. Then there are a number of links to with research and other things that will help people with each months goal. It’s a lot to do. Plus there’s the need to finish my book. I wished I didn’t need sleep so I could get more done each day!

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Today I gave up the idea that I need to react to or understand everything. I realized that I can just be, and that is okay.

Today I’m grateful that I got to spend time at the retreat center, that I felt spiritually and emotionally better, and that I worked on my Unearthing Happiness website.

I did no kindnesses that I could think of.

I spent no time in nature.

I spent about $23 on gas and $15 on food.

I slept for about 6 hours last night.

I meditated today.

I did not exercise today.

I did not follow my diet today.

I did not clean or straighten today.

I was not showered and did not brush my teeth today.

I was feeling sick and out of it, but it was otherwise good.  My temperament was good.

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