January 9, 2016

I awoke early and went for a hike. I had put thermals on and had bundled up. I was surprised that near the beginning of the hike I didn’t need my gloves. I also took my hat and scarf off a bit later. I was sweating a lot by the end.

When I got home, I did laundry, swept up, and planned most of my lessons for the upcoming week. I was feeling very tired and lazy, but did my best to have the place looking nice before Diego came over. He texted me and wanted to meet up at 7:30.

When I showed up, we both complained about our hunger, so he offered to take us out to eat at his cousin’s resturant. I warned him that I was still in my hiking clothes. I had a T-shirt with a thermal under it, ripped jeans with leggings under them, and my hair was pulled back into a braid that had many loose strands already escaping from it. I told him I wasn’t dressed to go out to eat. He said I was fine. So, of course, we ran into many people that he knew there. He introduced me to one of his cousins, whom I had mistaken for an American friend. He had a hat on, but his stubble looked blond-ish and he had bluish-green eyes. Diego had told me that one of his grandparents was white and that he was the only one in his family who was that dark. His cousin didn’t speak English well and, like everyone else, assumed that I didn’t speak Spanish. I didn’t catch everything that was said, but I caught something about him being at school. Then I heard the word for girlfriend and my ears perked up. He didn’t believe I was his girlfriend and made a sexual reference. For the first time, his cousin looked over at me and I smiled and blushed. I guess he realized that I understood, because he walked away not long afterwards. I later mused that this guy would scare the crap out of haters like Donald Trump. Not being able to even tell who the Hispanic immigrants are by looking at them would really mess with his worldview!

Then various waitresses came over to chat with him. They all spoke so rapidly that I understood virtually nothing. With all of the conversations that I was left out of and his staring at the TV the rest of the time, I had flashbacks to being ignored by my ex-husband. I got upset and talked to Kevin about it on Facebook for a little while. It even took Diego a fair amount of time to even realize that I wasn’t paying any attention to him either. I felt hurt. We finished our meal and he wanted to stop at a drug store afterwards. He was still sick, but he could tell that something was bothering me. As much as I hate it at the time, I really love the fact that he can read my moods and calls me on them. I told him about feeling left out. He explained that they were all showing their respect for me. He said that in his country people show their respect by not talking much at first. I told him it was the opposite here, that you talk to people when you first meet them to show them that you like them. He insisted on buying me stuff, so I got chap stick and a pair of headphones.

They actually sold a few sex toys there, like a bullet and a vibrator, which got us on a discussion about sex toys. He seems to think they are wrong because they take away from your partner. I couldn’t complain about thinking like that, to be honest. I told him that sometimes couples use them together and mentioned the sex shop nearby. He said that he often saw couples coming out of it together. It was difficult to determine if he was more upset about using the toys together or being seen walking out of a sex shop.

We went back to my place, watched a movie, had sex, and fell asleep. He was still a little sick, so I was surprised that he still wanted to have sex. He does seem to think of sex as a mark of a good relationship. I do too, but not quite to the extent that he does. We both drifted off to sleep not long afterwards.
———————–
Today I gave up the idea that someone else’s culture is weird and realized that mine is probably just as weird to him.

Today I’m grateful for a good hike, for getting my apartment in decent order, and getting to see Diego.

I did no kindnesses that I could think of.

I spent 90 minutes in nature.

I spent about $7 on food and $10 on laundry.

I slept for about 6 hours last night.

I did not meditate today.

I exercised for 90 minutes today.

I did not follow my diet today.

I cleaned and straightened today.

I was showered and brushed my teeth today.

I was in a good mood today. My temperament was good.

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