July 18, 2015

I spent the day working on making my apartment ready enough for guests.  Dan is coming to visit me tomorrow and I wanted to make sure that it looked at least somewhat neat.  I don’t know what it is, but no matter who comes to visit, I want to make sure my place looks nice.  I still haven’t finished making my bookshelves neat or tackled the piles of stuff on my kitchen counters, but I wanted everything off of the floor and the floor to at least appear clean.  I don’t know if it’s perfectionism or something that was innately learned watching my mom vacuum the house whenever someone was coming over.  Maybe it’s a matter of pride.  I don’t know.

I started thinking about guys and my dating life today.  I realized that I think a lot more before I get involved with someone.  I also realized that I’m really not getting hit on a lot by random guys anymore.  That really stopped around the same time that I put on this extra weight.  It’s actually kind of nice to know that a guy likes me for me and not my body.  Sure, I get a lot less attention, but the guys who show me that attention are much better people, on average, than the sorts who seemed to be attracted to me before.  It’s nice to finally see an “up” side to my weight gain!

I know this sounds really weird, but I have this butterfly feeling in my stomach like something good is going to happen at my hiking/camping trip.  I also don’t feel like things with me and Frank are over, even though he hasn’t called or messaged me since then.  Maybe I’m just kidding myself because I need someone/something to hold on to.


Relationships: I talked on the phone with my mom.

Meditation:  I did not meditate today.

Sleep: I slept 7 hours last night.

Exercise:  I did no exercise

Diet: I followed my diet well today.

De-cluttering and cleaning: I did both

Hygiene:  I did neither.

Mood and temperament: I was feeling very lazy earlier in the day, but felt happy with all I accomplished later in the day!  My temperament was good.


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